Puttering away our nickels

Welcome to our month long buy less plan! Read here to get caught up on what’s going on.

Day: 30

Product: It’s the last day to our monthly focus on buying less and I’ve saved a favorite for last. We rich people are very, very good at wasting our money on this one thing. We waste it daily. We nickle and dime it away and either don’t think of it at all or when it comes to our attention we insist we need to dish out the money as often as we do.

It’s gasoline.

Sure we are getting better. We pay attention to MPG when we think of buying a new car. We are aware of gas prices. We can do better yet.

Here are some gas wasting routines and suggestions on how to fix them.

When we use a drive thru. Every time you choose to carry your seated self around the building instead of walking inside to get your food/prescription/dry cleaning/beer/whathaveyou, you are wasting gas. Not only that it’s bad for your health. Unless you’re picking up your pain prescription for your broken ankle, you should walk inside. It’s easier to see the clerks as people that way too.

When we use our cars to transport only our one loney self. Vehicles usually have at least 5 seats. Think of the difference it would make if 5 people going to work every morning took one car instead of 5. I love carpooling. Conversely it is very hard to see streets full of cars with only one person in them.

When we brake hard and accelerate fast. By all means, brake hard if there is an emergency, otherwise slow down and put more space between yourself and the car in front of you. Every time you hit the brake you are wasting all the gas put into making that energy that wants you to go forward faster than you really want to. And wearing out the brakes. We don’t want to get to that squeally stage any quicker than we have to, right?

When we sit idling at any time. There’s a reason that these newer cars turn themselves off when they idle. You get 0 miles a gallon when you idle. There is a old wives tale floating around that says that it takes more gas to restart the car than it is to idle. That’s only true if you’ve idling for less than a few seconds. Turn it off.

When we take separate trips. Combine all your errands at once. There are two reasons. One is obvious, that combining errands will have you traveling fewer total miles, but it’s also helpful because your car just runs better when it’s warmed up. If you have to start your car cold for each separate trip, it is more wasteful than having one cold start and several stops.

When we get lost. Honestly I think this one may be worth it. I also may be the only person alive who thinks that getting lost is actually a good thing. I think it signifies adventure and a daring spirit going into unknown lands. I’ve said it to Mr. WW before when he’s gotten spun around, “hey, this is why we save money on gas in other ways. Don’t beat yourself up about it.” Hey, there’s always some ways we’ll be wasteful. We don’t do it intentionally but when we do we embrace the situation and don’t worry about it. Though hey, you should probably try and plan better so you don’t get lost in the first place if you can help it.

When we use gas power instead of people power. My favorite. Really, my favorite. I love, LOVE my push-powered lawn mower and I mowed our lawn with it every single time this year. I love my hand-powered hedge trimmer and I forged two new trails through heavily thorned brush with those things. But most of all, I love my leg-powered bike. The boys and I bike to school every day we can. The youngest is actually winey with the fact it hasn’t snowed seriously yet because he wants to bike in the snow. We always bike in the winter anymore. Cold isn’t a good enough reason to stop. There is something so empowering about commuting by bike. It’s invigorating. It’s wonderful. It takes no gas.

Bikes still run wonderfully in cold weather. In fact they handle the cold weather better than gas guzzlers.

These things add up to hundreds of dollars for most people every month. Combine that with taxes, insurance, wear and tear and it might be worth it for some of you to ditch the car and take the bus everywhere. That would really save on gas, wouldn’t it?

I won’t ask you to seriously ditch your car if you weren’t thinking that way anyway. I will ask you to at least be more aware. Think about how your everyday decisions add up. You can make positive changes in this area, I’m sure.

Reason to buy less: You can’t retire on ketchup packets and costume jewelry.

Suggestion:  For the last suggestion I have a tried and true way to curb spending. Only buy something if you really love it. Make sure each purchase is an intentional positive in your life.

If you find yourself buying things because you feel like it’s a good deal or because someone else thinks you should or your find yourself otherwise obligated, you’re buying too much.

Just say “no” to things you don’t love. Here are a couple hints I’ve heard:

For clothes only buy something you would be excited to wear right out of the dressing room. I did that at Goodwill once. I tried on a skirt I loved so I wore it home and tore the tag right of myself at the register to give to the clerk. I still have that skirt. And I got a compliment on it last time I wore it. Good choice.

Or try imagining some random person offering you either the product or the equivalent cash. Would you take the cash? Then don’t buy the product. It’s easier to distance yourself from the shopping hormones and really focus on the love for the product if you think of it as equivalent to the money it costs.

Anyway, if you only buy things you love you won’t be filled with regret when the credit card bill comes. It will have been worth the money spent and you will gladly pay the bill (in full with money you intentionally set aside at the beginning of the month for your credit card bill of course.)

So, I’m sure I have lots more to say about spending less but I’m sure you’re tired of me harping on it for now. I’ll be done for a little while while you mull over this information and let it grow on you.

Was there anything you thought was important that I missed?

Are there any tricks you use or are there any products you are careful to limit yourself with?

Running on wallet fumes?

Welcome to our month long buy less plan! Read here to get caught up on what’s going on.

Day: 29

Product: Only in the last 100 years have people been willing to buy this particular thing. In fact, we used to have so much surplus of this product, anyone trying to sell it would be laughed out of town.

Nowadays we pay monthly for the right to simply run in place. We plug our ears and focus our eyes on pictures of things as far away as possible from where we really are. We exercise with no purpose except because our doctors tell us we should.

What has changed? Years ago we worked with our hands and backs because we had to. If we didn’t keep moving we didn’t eat. Now we have so much convenience that if we don’t force ourselves to move we die from all sorts of ugly diseases caused/aggravated by lethargy.

It’s not all bad. No one would purposefully want to go back to the days of sewing all our clothes and making every meal from flour, sugar, salt, and rabbit backstraps. Convenience is just too darn convenient to not appreciate it.

But how do we keep ourselves from dying of convenience while living well in the meantime?

How about we choose as many of the beneficial aspects of exercise as we can get?

The movement is good, we got that part. You know what else is good? Fresh air, sunshine, comradery, accomplishment. Add as many of those things into your exercise regimen as you can. You don’t have to weed the ½ acre canning garden with your daughter but you can run a 5K with your neighbor.

Strangely enough, when you exercise with these additional benefits it all the sudden becomes free! You don’t need to pay a gym. You don’t need special equipment. Even if your goal is muscles you can do that without fancy equipment. Check this idea out- I love it.

So quit buying your exercise and find a way to utilize the free outdoors or find physical volunteer work or just think outside of the box instead of paying a monthly fee. Just because everyone else does it this way now doesn’t mean that you have to.

Reason to buy less: Somewhere in your house is that $5 bill you misplaced.

Suggestion: It can be done. You can go through life and never pay full price for a product. You can always find some deal on some thing. Buy it used. Find a coupon. Wait for it to go on clearance. There’s always some way.

Can you challenge yourself to do that?

Now, this does not mean you should buy something because it’s not full price. “Oh look, those shoes are 15% off, I should buy them.” Don’t do that.

If you want a product, search and wait until you can find a deal on it. The point is to not go out and buy something without careful consideration that you’re getting the best deal.

Be very careful and intentional with your purchases. It can mean big savings.

I counter your doubt with today’s example

Welcome to our month long buy less plan! Read here to get caught up on what’s going on.

Day: 28

Product: When we bought our cabin we got a very, very run down place. It’s been over a year now and, as much as we love to come here as much as possible, we’ve been repairing it very, very slowly.

The countertop had this huge crack right in the middle of the sink, front and back. The sink itself sprayed water everywhere when you turned on the water.  And we’ve been living with it for over a year. We are finally getting it fixed and boy am I excited.

We’ve been looking at new countertops for awhile but now we’ve finally decided that we’ve earned the new countertop/sink.

Yesterday Mr. WW headed to one of those warehouse/flea market places for building supplies. There were huge buildings full of scraps/incorrect special orders/damaged/reclaimed goods. He found a countertop that would work with a big bubble right in the middle. Since our sink would go in the middle, that bubble doesn’t bother us a bit.

He then brought it home on a trailer borrowed from a friend. See, he and the friend took the trip together so the friend could haul some of his scrap to the dump. We supplied the vehicle, the friend supplied the trailer. Both got something they wanted out of the trip as well as spending time together.

When it arrived home our ten-year-old was keen on watching and learning how to install the whole deal.

Mr. WW pulled the sink from the shed he’d bought almost a year ago. It’s extra deep and a nice style so when he saw it for cheap at a thrift store he had picked it up.

While they where figuring out how to caulk the new sink it was the 10-year-old who had the idea to put it in then turn it over and caulk from underneath so that’s what they did. They then recruited the 7-year-old to help by moving things out of the way and the mom (me) to lift the whole shebang high enough to get it onto the counter. All in all it was very much a family affair.

Now there were some issues. There were boards that needed trimming, the faucet that came with the sink ended up being kaput, and the sink had an extra hole than what we needed. But we worked through them. The wondrously weird clan used their noggins and figured things out.

Here’s the eldest trying to recapture the cord to the refrigerator I so flippantly tossed aside as we were placing the counter top. He had to hold the flashlight in his mouth but he got it. 

The bottom line? The counter top that normally would have been at least $150 was only $50. The sink that would have been $250 was only $8. I have no idea how much it would have cost us to pay someone to put it in for us and we got to keep that experience for free. We also kept good things from going into a landfill somewhere.

When it comes to building supplies there are tons of ways to minimize. Think outside of the box. A lot of things are made for others and they can’t use it like our counter with the bubble in the middle or the leftover tiles after a job is completes or a door that the distributor put the handle on the wrong side or a 2-year-old off-white microwave after someone decided they want their kitchen to have black appliances.

For those do-it-yourself projects your problem solving skills are already getting a much-loved workout. May as well flex that muscle a bit more and see how you can save your wallet some money as well.

Reason to buy less: It’s hard to focus on small quiet things when a house full of clutter looms large.

Suggestion: I don’t know if I’ve made this clear yet: a manufacture’s job is to make as much profit as they possibly can. Everything they do, EVERYTHING, is with the point of making more money.

You can’t blame them, that’s their job. Just remember that that’s their job.

They don’t have sales or deals to help you out. If they can convince you to buy something of theirs it is for their profit, not for your benefit.

That weekly grocery store trip to stock the trash can

Welcome to our month long buy less plan! Read here to get caught up on what’s going on.

Day: 27

Product: So how’s today gone for ya’? Besides being a day retailers have devoted you to shopping all day, it’s also leftover day.

Yesterday was the first time I’ve ever done the full Thanksgiving meal all myself. 9 dishes and 2 pies all made from scratch and ready at the same time. Besides a little fear that the potatoes weren’t boiling fast enough, it all came together wonderfully. The turkey was falling apart moist, my self-described pre-teen was sucking down the gravy wondering why it kept disappearing on his plate as he mixed it with every dish, seconds (and sometimes thirds, and fourths) were had by all.

Thanksgiving is the day we celebrate our blessings by intentional decadence. If we live with this kind of decadence all the time Thanksgiving wouldn’t be special.

That’s why during every other meal I make sure the turkey is dry- maybe a little charred.

No. Of course that’s not what I mean.

I mean that expecting and getting everything you want to the point of uncomfortable bloatedness is not done at every meal. We respect the food and limit ourselves unless it is some special occasion.

I’ve got some horrific statistics for you.  40% of the food produced in the US is thrown away—that’s almost half! The average American throws away 25% of the food they buy. That equals 96 billion pounds of food every year that would be worth $165 billion. The average American household, retailer, and farmer is very wasteful.

It’s not really our fault. It’s what we’re used to. Farmer’s can’t sell produce that’s ugly. Retailers sell more with overstocked displays. Individuals think that food past the best by date is unsafe.

We need to change our thinking and we can do a lot at the home level. I could do a series on food alone for a whole month. Here are a few things:

• Those best by dates are totally arbitrary. Besides baby formula that is regulated by the government, suppliers set their own date standards for their products. It is more financially beneficial to them to hold those dates as tight as possible. That product is not going to magically go bad the moment the calendar rolls over to the day it says on the package. Use your good sense God gave ya’. If it smells, is slimy, or looks different don’t eat it. Otherwise dig in.
• Eat leftovers. Please. Who do you think you are that you need freshly prepared food every meal? Eat some humble pie that was made two days ago. It’s still perfectly good.
• Don’t dig around in the produce department. I know this is a hard one. We want the most for our buck but let me tell you, if you don’t buy that smallish head of lettuce no one will and it will rot in a landfill. It is likely that if you buy the biggest head you won’t eat the entire head and the difference will end up in your trash anyway.
• Buy ugly produce and funky packages. Just two days ago I was buying a two liter of soda. I grabbed one and went to move along when I noticed one without a label. The missing label was sitting next to it, apparently victim of some faulty glue. I put my good one back and picked up the naked one with the loose label for the clerk to scan. If I hadn’t rescued him he would have certainly headed to the dumpster.
• Just buy less. Make a list and stick to it. If your meals are planned you don’t have that broccoli sitting in the fridge just waiting for you to notice him when you’re in the mood to be healthy. Plan when you are going to eat that broccoli so he isn’t stood up and ends up wilting and leaving dejected to your trash can.
• Don’t toss the entire product if some is bad. Of course this doesn’t work for milk but you can safely cut mold off cheese, black spots off cauliflower, and bruises off of apples.

If you can’t bring yourself to do all these things just think of this: what would it be like to have a 25% larger grocery budget? That’s what it would be like if you didn’t throw food away. Eat it all. As your mother would say, there are starving children in Africa who would appreciate that good food.

Oh here’s another statistic: 1 out of 6 of Americans are food insecure and reducing food waste in America by just 15% would provide nutrition to 25 million Americans. Maybe mom was onto something.

Go eat those Thanksgiving leftovers.

Reason to buy less: You don’t want any extra reasons for a thief to be in your house longer.

Suggestion: When you buy things it is important to carefully think through your needs and decide when quality matters. Sometimes (only sometimes) you will want to spend a little more for a higher quality item.

I’m a big fan of dollar stores but sometimes they are just landfill fillers. If that product doesn’t work for you and you have to go back and buy it again you are just perpetuating waste.

This is why I am a huge fan of buying used. If a product has survived someone else’s use and is still going strong, you are buying a quality product.

Now, not everything you own should be the high-end type. A good way to see what you should buy for quality is to buy the first one the dirt cheap version. If you’re use trashes it too quickly to make it worth it, then allow yourself to buy a nicer version. That way you’ve basically earned the right to make that decision.

The lights are on. Is anyone home?

Welcome to our month long buy less plan! Read here to get caught up on what’s going on.

Day: 25

Product: Thomas Edison didn’t try to get that lightbulb thing right 1,000 times for you to be flippant. For that matter, electricity itself is so amazing, powerful, and dangerous and the ability we have to rein it in and use it for something as wonderful as light is something to be seriously appreciated with humble wonder.

How can someone just mindlessly slap at a switch on a wall and then walk away from that awesome wonder that is so cautiously contained in such a small space yet shooting out in light all around the room?

We waste electricity all the time. It’s yet another area where most people spend more money than we need to.

The most obvious electricity waster is lights left on when we’re not in the room. It takes a lot of effort not to fall into the bad habit of leaving on the lights. Just ask kids. It is NOT natural for us to turn off lights. Kids need 78,560,003 reminders to turn off their lights before they remember to do it themselves once.

You can break it down into two categories: making sure you don’t consume electricity you aren’t using (like the turning off of lights or fighting vampire charges) and making sure you are not consuming more electricity than you need to for your purpose.

To make sure you’re not consuming more than you need to there are lots of tips. Here are a few:

• Insulate your hot water heater (if it’s a gas heater that won’t help with electricity but it’s still a good idea.)
• Don’t use your clothes dryer when it’s nice out and the sunshine is free.
• Use LED lightbulbs.
• Turn the temperature up a little on your fridge.
• Use a rake and manual set of clippers instead of an electric leaf blower and electric clippers.
• Use Energy Star appliances.
• Run the air conditioner as little as possible. Shading your house with plants, closing shades, and just being tougher and not so wussy helps with that.

Reason to buy less: You don’t want to be identified by your things.

Suggestion: If you fully appreciate what you already have you will not need nearly as much stuff. Just a few key details shifted will draw attention to different details each time.

So learn to accessorize. You can even accessorize with the things you already have without having to buy more. Be adventurous and think outside of the box.  It makes those old things seem new again and you won’t feel so drawn to buy new stuff.

Hairy situation

Welcome to our month long buy less plan! Read here to get caught up on what’s going on.

Day: 23

Product: The people who have stumbled on the joy of this next trick stick with it. If you could possibly figure out how to cut hair, you can save a lot of money.

Boys cuts can be super easy. Clippers give an easy buzz cut. If you want anything different, it definitely more difficult, but there is good news: every six weeks you get another chance to practice.

Mr. WW just cut our own boys hair last night and he’s been cutting his own hair too for many, many years.

Sure the seven-year-old’s hair would look better with a comb run through it, but he is seven years old. Otherwise, it’s a nice haircut.

A few years ago Mr. WW’s cut was shorter while the boys’ were longer. It’s amazing the range you can do at home. 

Girl cuts are also easy, straight cut across the bottom and an optional straight cut in the front for optional bangs. If you want fancier, let me introduce you to my personal self-layered haircut.

Just make a ponytail at your forehead, yes, this in a picture of the front of me, then cut a straight line as short as you like (for the first time be cautious and start small. You can always try again if it’s too long.)

Tada! Layers coming higher around the face.

If none of these options appeal to you, take to the internet. YouTube is full of tutorials.

And cutting your own hair is strangely appealing and fulfilling. Just ask any two-year-old. You know you want to.

Reason to buy less: Contentment. Yes, that’s it. Be content with that reason.

Suggestion: Beware of free. Just because it’s free doesn’t mean you should get it.

This one is difficult for me. I hate things going to a landfill. If someone is going to throw something out I feel like I have an obligation to give it a home. Thankfully we have these places called thrift stores that take in poor orphaned items and helps them find a new loving home. If there is value yet, it should not go into a trash can.

Just remember that free is only worth it if you gain anything from the product. If it’s just going to be another piece of clutter to clog your life, even with its $0 price tag, it’s is not worth the costs.

Just say no.

Toying with an idea

Welcome to our month long buy less plan! Read here to get caught up on what’s going on.

Day: 21

Product: Yesterday I gave a small-potatoes suggestion for limiting money wasted on entertainment. Today, here’s a big one. We are really good at spending lots and lots of money on toys.

But, you say, you don’t have kids? Well I’m not thinking about the kids’ toys.

Boats, snowmobiles, extra cars, fancy lawnmowers, big TVs, fancy grills, fancy grills (er, teeth)—all this stuff is an easy way to blow lots of money.

 

The snake is crafty. 

People who like to have these things usually have the same argument for buying them, “you only live once.” Well that’s true. You only live once. So why would you waste your limited resources on things that are so empty? One fancy TV in your twenties can equal 24 TVs in your retirement if you were to invest the money instead.

I am not advocating for no extra money spent on products used just for fun. Just don’t crazy with it. Buy used, buy infrequently, and by all means share what you have.

If you get the big TV, invite others to your house for the game; if you have a pickup, lend it to friends when they need to move furniture; if you have the fancy grill, invite others over for BBQ—so they can see and appreciate your shiny teeth, ha ha.

You have to use your resources to enjoy them for what they are truly worth. Money is not meant to be hoarded. We shouldn’t translate it into empty stuff and surround ourselves with empty reminders of what we have. We shouldn’t even stash it all away in a bank and keep it forever just so we can look at the numbers and feel successful.

If we use our money wisely we can limit the time we have to work. We can put in less overtime and put in less time overall (if we want, although no matter how much you enjoy your job, not many people want to work into their 70’s.)

We can’t be wise if we collect more and more toys.

Reason to buy less: A smaller house holds less stuff. A smaller house is cheaper in mortgage/rent payments and in property taxes (which continue on even if your house is paid off,) and in utilities.

Suggestion: Experiences—it’s where it’s at. The only place you have to store experiences is in your memory and your memory is a rockstar at storing experiences. It’s been studied time and again that kids remember what their parents did with them, not what they bought them.

The same goes for you. You will remember that time your Uncle Lenny did a belly-flop when all the family decided to meet at the neighborhood pool on that hottest day of the year. You will remember when that physics professor actually launched a catapult in the classroom. You will remember when you stopped and climbed over the cool looking rocks with your kids.

Now, sometimes memories do get attached to items, and that’s fine. However, if you do that too often you become a hoarder. Do you want to find worth in the 1,000’s of knickknacks you’ve collected over the years or in your ability to belly-laugh while pulling your spouse out of the snow hill he/she got himself/herself stuck in?

I’m not saying you have to go and get rid of everything you find close to you (although getting rid of a few would make that drawer not get stuck.) Just don’t buy more with the intention of using it to make you happy.

Experiences are very often totally free and if you find it worth it to spend money on an experience your dollar will go much further than on another gadget or pair of shoes.

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/39415470@N02/8264213903″>Jewelry</a&gt; via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

You need this product to cover all your rocks

Welcome to our month long buy less plan! Read here to get caught up on what’s going on.

Day: 14

Product: What if you could cut down a specific product you buy by half. That’s a good rate. We’d all like our money to go twice as far, right? This one is simple and easy.

Print on both sides of your paper. Paper comes with two sides, each equally perfect for writing or drawing or taking notes on. If you use both sides of a piece of paper, we get double the use out of our paper.

This is easiest to do when we have a letter or report or something that is over a page long. Just print the first page then turn it over and print more on the other side.

It takes a little more conscious effort to use both sides of a paper when you use them for something that is only one page.

The trick is to have a spot with half-used paper and to draw from that spot when you print a one-paged thing or return papers to when you’re done using them and their only half used.

You should always use your paper wisely. You don’t want to run out.

I even use the other sides of papers that others have used. When I had to spend some time in the hospital they sent me home with a bunch of single-sided pages of instructions. I get flyers for events my kids are invited to –often in beautifully bright colors- I get mail with only side printed. I even got a full box full of one-side-printed paper from Freecycle to use.

The same goes for other types of paper as well. Do you make out a shopping ling on those long list papers? When you’re done with your shopping, take the list back home and spin the paper around and use the opposite side the next week. (It may be helpful to see what you purchased the week before anyway.)

Yes, I know using paper so thoroughly sounds cheap and petty. How expensive is paper anyway? And are we saving the environment that much? Paper is easily recyclable.

It’s just that simple living is a way of life. I kinda permeates into everything, even down to paper. This thing is not hard and it’s just good practice. We should be aware of our actions, no matter how small.

So pay attention to that beautiful blank white page ready for your use the next time to come across paper with only writing on one side. It’s value is there. Don’t overlook the little things.

Reason for spending less: You don’t want to dust any more stuff!

Suggestion: It’s a lot easier to spend more if you go shopping with friends. Friends are great at pointing out what looks good on s and what great taste we have. Encouraging friends are wonderful people to have in our lives. However, if their encouraging causes us to spend money we don’t need to spend, it’s better to have them over to play cards or something.

This suggestion does not apply if your friend is me, of course– or anyone like me. A friend who is conscious of overspending is going to encourage you not to spend.

Now, it may be that I’m a miserable person so shop with, but I don’t think so. I do like to shop because I have never had a problem picking up an item, admiring it’s beauty or function or comedic nature, then putting it back. Until you learn the fine art of appreciation without spendation, just don’t shop with friends as a fun time out.

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/13589188@N00/3164059182″>How We Roll – 52 Stories – Pt 1</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

How to hug a friend– sometimes without touching them

I was never much of a hugger when I was younger. I thought of physical touch as an invasion of personal space.

But I remember when the tide turned. It was after I was married and I was working at the Credit Union. I don’t remember who it was or why, but someone broke the touch barrier. I remember them putting their hand on my shoulder as they leaned from behind to help me with something. I remember thinking, “Wow, they’re touching me and it feels kinda nice. Like they are comfortable with me. And you know what? I’m comfortable with them too.”

(Note: There was the one guy who was infamous for his back rubs of the single ladies– it wasn’t him. I do remember that he wore great cologne. Really. Great. Cologne.  Note that single guys. Skip the Axe and buy good cologne– and don’t be weird and give back rubs to acquaintances.)

I’ve since learned how to kindly break that touch barrier myself. I’ve many times repeated the hand on the shoulder touch. I’ve perfected the “I’m trying to scoot around you and there’s not much space so I’ll touch my fingertips to your back to let you know I’m here.” I’ve jump hugged friends in their ecstasy and I’ve held friends while they sobbed in pain.

But one of my very favorite hugs is the “you’re sick” hug. No, it’s not that I’m rejoicing in someone being ill. I’m also not talking about the supportive, “you found out you have cancer” or “you have a migraine” hug. I’m talking about a good ‘ole “you’re contagious” hug.

Right. That’s why I love them. Because of your reaction right there.

No one gives “you’re contagious” hugs. But that’s the whole point.

When you’re sick you’re not feeling very lovable. You’re nose is red and/or your face is pale. You don’t feel like doing your hair or makeup and you wear only your comfiest clothes. You feel “blah” and “ick” and ugly on top of it. And then everyone avoids you. It adds insult to injury.

Everybody’s okay with it though. They understand how germs work and they don’t want to get their friends sick. I am the same way when I’m sick, but not when I’m healthy and a friend is ill.

I hug ‘em.

Call me weird, but I am willing to risk catching their germs in order to show that I’m supportive of them. I know that I may get sick. But I’m healthy and not afraid of the consequences. I know that germs will come (if not from this friend, from some random door knob or something) and I know that I may suffer for a time but I will conquer them because I’m a healthy person. I may as well catch the germs from supporting a person I love.

And because it’s so unexpected and at such a down time, it means so much more than a normal hug.

That’s what’s good about being healthy. It’s also what’s good about being financially healthy.

When you are at all financially healthy, you can take the risk and jump in bravely to risky situations. You can back your neighbor kid’s first foray into business by buying his lemonade supplies for him. You can lend your sister with no credit history the rest of the money to buy her first car. You can even buy the groceries of the old lady in front of you at the grocery store.

Will you lose money? Possibly. But it is good for you to take those risks.

Sure it’s good for that neighbor kid, that sister trying to get her first job that requires a car, that old lady on a fixed income, and that friend who’s achy with a horrible case of the sniffles. But it’s also good for you! The loss of income or the ability to breathe through your own nose for a time is a small price to pay for the feeling of human connection.

And then you build up immunity. Just as your body gets practice whippin’ those germs, you get practice on handling surprise expenses. You learn how to roll with the punches (to take a YNAB term) and you learn how to deal with the unplanned loss.

So if you’re not at a place where you are financially healthy right now, do what you can to get there! Open a savings for emergencies. Pay down that credit card. Cancel that cable. Drink that Vitamin C or do those sit ups.

When you are healthy you can do so much more—and you should!

See, even if you’re not a hugger we can get that human connection. We can support and encourage others and it’s good for everyone involved to allow ourselves to suffer a little bit. We grow and improve and we do it together. So open yourself up. A little voluntary exposure ends up a win/win. Unless you’re a weird guy who gives back rubs. Um, no.

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/14915934@N07/5489480385″>Civil – Débora & Matías</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/34199510@N00/7400646728″>Hug</a&gt; via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/34176077@N02/6711933651″>BAM!</a&gt; via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/7284700@N06/2881031710″>Sick Me, Right Now</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

Collections (and I don’t mean coins)

Most people cringe at the term “collections.” It conjures thoughts of never ending phone calls at dinner, mean letters and a fear of coming out of the house in the morning to find the car gone being loaded on a flatbed by a some aloof jerk who won’t let you get your stuff out.

When I worked at a Credit Union in my early 20’s I didn’t have anything more than a secured line of credit but I felt the same way about collections. Yuck.

One of my jobs was to file copies of collection letters in the mortgage file vault. (It sounds horrible and tedious, but as a true introvert I loved being alone with the files for long chunks of time.)

See, doesn’t that look appealing? Tell me they’re alphabetized and I’m a happy girl.

Most of the time I just stuffed and moved on my way but sometimes I read the letters. Sometimes I opened the file and read ALL the letters.

I saw patterns. Sometimes I saw a basic letter reminding of a missed payment and I could see that the same letter went out about once a year and that normally they paid. I saw accounts that were constantly in a behind state. In each stack of letters to file I saw the reminder/request/demand to pay what they had agreed to pay.

It changed my perspective. Instead of “yuck” collectors that won’t leave you alone, I saw “yuck” mortgage holders that weren’t holding up their end of the bargain.

Either way it was true. Collections can be a cold and miserable process that no one likes.

The lightbulb

I distinctly remember the day I tried to shoot the breeze with someone from collections. “Hey, that’s some job you have there. It must be terrible to call and try to collect money from these people all day long.”

His head jerked up in surprise and an interesting look appeared on his face. “Actually it’s not bad. A lot of these people fall on hard times and they just need someone to understand and help them through it. They don’t not want to pay. They just need someone to help them work through it so they can.”

You know what that look on his face was? It was pity. But I now know it wasn’t really pity for the people he was calling. It was pity for me. I had taken a cold approach to finances and if I didn’t change I would be miserable.

I remember being taken aback. This guy was in collections but in that one statement he registered to me as one of the nicest men I had ever known.

Fast forward 10 years

Guess who does collections work now? Yep. Me. One of the main components of my job is to contact our customers who are behind in paying. It’s almost surreal.

I now see both sides. There are days when I feel like I’m beating my head against a wall. I get snippy and feel rude and will only be happy if we agree to never work with this customer again. With those customers I see the form letters and the constantly ringing phone line. Who would ever want to do this work?

Then there are the people I would BEND OVER BACKWARD to help. I will waive fees without a moment’s hesitation and speak up for them to my superiors so that their debt can go on longer without more serious ramifications. These days I see the people. I understand what that guy so many years ago said. I really just want to help.

No, I’m not bi-polar or a split personality or even just overtired/well slept. I will tell you the secret.

It’s huge.

If you know nothing else about collections, you should know this:

It all depends on the customer just being visible as a person.

I can attest. There are most likely some awesome people that are working on your account. Most of the time they do not want to do anything but help you out. But you have, and I mean HAVE to communicate with them. You can’t be a void at the end of an email request or a ringing phone line. It doesn’t matter too much what you really say. You just have to be visible.

If I have someone tell me, plainly, “I can’t get it today but I should be able to next Wednesday” you can guarantee that I’m sleeping soundly until next Wednesday. If, instead, I don’t get a response I’m either emailing or looking at the account with a furrowed brow daily until I hear from them.

The WORST thing you can do is not respond to a collector. It leaves you as just another number. Just another account that did not care to keep up your end of the bargain.

No guy! Don’t throw out your overdue bills because you don’t think you can face them right now!

And so, conversely, the best thing you can do is talk to them. They are REAL people. Just because their job is to get you to pay doesn’t mean that you can only answer the phone if you have your routing number ready to go to pay right then.

I did this myself just now.

I talked to someone whose job it was to collect on MY account. (Take a moment to pick your jaw up off the floor.… Hey, I make mistakes too.)

You see, we use a rewards credit card. We love it and use it as often as we can (because, you know, rewards!) I had a problem with the automatic payment. I thought it was supposed to pull the full balance but instead it pulled the statement balance. When we replaced our roof this summer the big charge got us into a dangerous place, too close to the limit.

So I took off the automatic payment, intending to do the payments myself.

Bad idea.

I goofed, several ways. I was late with a payment and then I made a payment and somehow it put the payment date as the next statement date instead of the current date. I clicked through it all and just plain screwed it up. For weeks I looked at the late fee and finance charge on my account in horror and shame and then today, I went on to discover that the payment I had made hadn’t posted and so my account was STILL overdue!

So I called them. I was ashamed and I let her know it. It was all my fault and I let her know that too. I was apparently not grown up enough to handle a credit card and online payment by myself and I even let her know that.

She laughed. She commiserated. She made sure to put a note on the account that as soon as the payment cleared she would reverse the finance charge and interest fees.

Now this is very interesting. Very interesting when you consider all the details.

This is a major credit card which is paying out decent rewards. I use their card all the time and they handle everything with the retailers and they pay me rewards and they have NEVER even had the chance to charge me for any of it. In their CEO’s eyes I would be a bad customer. They don’t make any money off me. In fact, they lose money on my account! Yet, the one time they have the right to legitimately charge me for their services and patience for something that was fully my doing, they happily reversed off the charges. With a smile.

THIS is collections. It is real people. The worst thing you can do is hide. The best thing you can do is talk to someone who truly understands that it’s a rough financial world out there. These people hear it all. They’re not there to judge. They’re just there to help.

So pay your bills people. On time every time if you can. If you can’t, you have the wonderful opportunity to meet someone new that you can connect with and be honest with your financial situation with.

Don’t be like 20-year-old me and think that collections is cold and heartless. It’s only that way if you make it that way.

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/80634066@N00/3669785198″>file drawer</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/28451957@N06/2805759881″>Set 1 Latepaymentnotices 1</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/10787737@N02/14458595168″>May 20, 2014</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;